It's not hard for me to love you, no, it's not a difficult thing.

At this point, I'm supposed to be starting on my 2000-word essay. Alas... I am not.

Sitting here in front of my computer typing this... I actually feel content. Not gleefully happy, or nonchalance, or wistful sadness. Just. Content.

To be honest, my life isn't completely going smoothly. As least, not how I would want to picture it. I seem to be losing a few friends here and there. I'm still horribly lazy about going to the gym. (Which I really should to train and strengthen that ankle of mine.) I still don't have someone in my life to call my own. And I'm not totally up to par with school work.

But listen: I'm not worrying. Firstly, you lose friends here and there. Some come, some go. I shouldn't worry that much about it. At the end of the day, if it wasn't meant to be, then I'll let it go, knowing that I tried my best and wasn't any more I could do. The gym, yeah... I really should go. So maybe this week, I'll plan one or two sessions. (Nothing to worry about now, I suppose.) About school work, well, I've been doing work the past few days. It's still a slow process, but at least I'm doing something. :)

And someone to call my own? Haha. I actually surprised myself with this one. Thinking about it now... I don't need anyone right now. If someone comes along, and we hit it off, great! But you know what? I've stopped looking. I've actually stopped looking. Wow. It's hilarious, me typing this. I couldn't believe it myself, to be honest. No, I've not given up on love. No, I'm not completely black-hearted now, filled with the shambles of past relationships. (Lol.) I've just, lifted this up to God.

I've been feeling a bit more confident about myself. Well, to be honest, that comes and goes faster than Wile E. Coyote blows himself up with Acme TNT, but hey. It's a learning curve.

You know what helps? The occasional annoying conversation from a random acquaintance on facebook. I've not talked to him in years, but recently, he's been talking to me a lot more. It's flattering more than anything to be completely honest. So even when I complain about it on twitter or to my friends, I've gotta admit, it's things like these that make me smile and realise that hey, I'm someone who's attractive and there're people out there who think so. So I don't need a particular person's opinion to keep me going. :)

And of course, no matter how many friends come and go, I know the few that will always be there. Never judging, never leaving. And that makes me happy. Because I could have 1000 facebook friends and 1000 twitter followers, but as long as I have these friends, everyone else could 'un-friend'/'un-follow' me and it would be okay. :)

So, yeah. Even though things aren't perfect now, I'm content. :)

You know what? A friend of mine once said that he loathed perfection. Because it took with it imagination, creativity and drive. And he's right. We should all strive for perfection. But the best part about life is that we will probably never get any. And that's fine by me. :)