That’s what we’ve been told, but the story’s getting old.

Today was fantastic.

However, it was also exhausting.

Extremely.

It was really awesome spending time with Mel. It’s always a blast talking to her and well, annoying her a little.

The only downside was underwater world and the dolphin lagoon being nothing like what I imagined.

I remember loving riding through the tunnel in underwater world as a kid. However, the fishes we saw today were, well, that’s it. They were just fishes. And I guess I just placed these attractions so high up on a pedestal, when I actually got to experience them now, it seems to pale in comparison.

Well, it was still fun dipping our feet in the water at Palawan beach and then running to the toilet because the hot sand felt like glass under my feet. (I say ‘my feet’ cuz’, well, I was the only one running and hopping.)

We met Ping at vivo and had soup amidst old memories and easy conversation. Ping’s recount of her tales at Jurong Polyclinic was especially fun to listen to:

Doctor: So, what' is JC like? [N.B. He wasn’t Singaporean, apparently.]

Ping: Well, we’re split into two streams, Arts and Science.

Doctor: (In a fast, soft tone) Diarrhoea how many days?

Ping: No, we don’t offer that as a subject.

After that, we headed to Nex@Serangoon and raced cars at the arcade.

And then, Ping and I headed to Teo Heng for Karaoke with the guys.

I really did miss them, so it was fun listening to their nonsense again.

It was just one of the days when you have so much fun, you fall into your bed at the end of the day happy and satisfied. And GD tired.

Hopefully, I get to have more days like these before I leave all my friends here in Singapore.

Laughs. Friends. Nostalgia.

The best combination.

I wrote 200 letters I will never send

Last night, I reminisced about Nickelodeon.

For more than a decade of my life, I grew up with the channel; its shows often providing many laughs and life lessons.

Everyday after school, it was almost ingrained into me the ritual to turn on the TV and grab the remote, pressing ‘32’.

When my mother cancelled the kids channels, it took me weeks to get rid of the ‘reflex’. Every time I turned to channel ‘32’ and saw the words ‘This channel is not available to you’, my heart broke a little and I would sigh inwardly.

Sure, this sounds over-dramatic to you, but as a child, I absolutely adored Nickelodeon. It never failed to bring me joy, especially when I was upset.

Now that I’m all grown-up, I guess I do miss these small things that used to cheer me up greatly and make everything okay.

Nowadays, it just seems to take a lot of ‘cheering up’ to actually cheer me up. I mean, I may appear outwardly happy, but inside’s just plenty of turmoil.

I guess that’s the price you pay for maturity and responsibility. Plenty of baggage to go along with it.

On a different note, I was horribly distracted during driving today. And my test is in 2 months. Horrible. Sigh.

And I wonder if I ever crossed your mind.

It’s amazing how much difference a few weeks make.

What I thought I felt has completely been dissolved into mere memories toppled off with bad feelings of ‘What-the-fuck-was-I-thinking?’

It’s funny, though. The difference between the actual event and the presumed one is greatly vast.

It’s really crazy the feelings that run through my nerves when I think back on what I used to feel, as opposed to the revulsion that courses through my veins now.

And he is so full of shit, it makes me wonder whether I was thinking with my ass a month ago.

It’s hilarious. I can’t help but laugh. A month ago, I would’ve been blogging about how sweet he was when he said this and blah, blah, blah…

Now, I read everything he says and I roll my eyes and/or think ‘Yeah, fucking right.’ in acid tones.

I don’t think he realises that the moment he did what he did, I lost all trust in him. I don’t even respond to his ‘nicknames’ anymore. I tried telling him last night, but I don’t think he got it.

I honestly don’t know how he gets the gall to pretend that everything’s really okay. Guys are so fucking clueless.

The best part about all this, though, is that I don’t really wanna stop talking to him. I think, mainly, because I don’t have much else to do. At least, for now.

We’ll see again, I guess.

For now, it’s still nice to have someone think I’m that awesome.

I am turning into such a bitch. =/

In another life, I would be your girl.

I just had an extremely satisfying shower. My hair is all conditioned and my skin smells like flowers. :D

And my granny’s here! She’s so cute and all. (And I always get the money from her that I TRY to reject because it’s like this thing that we do.) But now, my room’s gonna smell of her oils and old people. Which would be cool. Except for the fact that it’s not, really.

Yesterday, Belle, Tia and I went to ‘recee’ Zouk’s mambo night. We arrived at 9.20. Horribly early, considering we were one of the first few parties to arrive, and no one was dancing/drinking yet.

And no one mambo-ed. At least, not until past midnight, which was the duration of which Tia and I stayed until. Honestly, thumbs up should be given for the horribly cheap drinks. (I paid like, less than $20 for three drinks! more than half the amount I would have to fork over in Timbre or any other bar I’ve been to.) And the music they played over in Zouk’s main club. Classic upbeat songs that made Tia and I sway continuously in our seats. I was honestly itching to hit the dance floor. Except, the UV lights in the club took us all by surprise. And not in a good way. Plus, there were no cute ang moh boys. They were either already taken… or kinda that much older. How sad.

Oh well.

We’re still going next week. It’s still cheap. I do agree with Tia, though. I’m not really a fan of the drunk girls slurring swears in the toilet in the midst of throwing up. Nor am I a fan of wild boys swearing in hokkien, like, everywhere.

I think these are signs that I am not a fan of the party scene. I do love drinks though. And hanging with my babes. But.. that’s like, it.

In other news, I finally got a reply from Alex. Which has opened a can of worms. I kinda wish he didn’t bother. At all. Thank goodness for the fact that the can of worms he opened is small enough to be controlled.

On one hand, I really don’t care about online chatting anymore. It got old. And kinda boring. And well, I’m tired of the kind of people you meet there. They’re all the same. With the exception of their screen names. Which would probably BE the same if it was allowed.

“Imabigdick_3000”

But, well, I did have fun talking to him. And I really don’t see the harm in continuing to talk to him as a friend (and nothing more.) I mean, it’s not like I'd take the next plane to Michigan. (with the long flight and layovers, it really is a turn-off.)

Of course, my dear friend, Elaina, would probably kill me. And I wouldn’t get the puzzle.

I should get a puppy. I would name him ‘puppy’. And then, when he grows into a bigger dog, I might call him ‘bigger dog’. Cuz’, you know, he’s my dog. And I can.

Take a bite of my heart tonight

Honestly, I can’t decide on a lot of things right now.

I wish I could get someone to make all my major decisions for me.

It just seems like a lot of pressure on my part to make the decisions that fit me the best. Each choice having its own consequence and impact.

Recently, I downloaded my 150 game pack into my laptop. Which honestly, with the exception of Tradewinds, just lagged the whole computer.

I also downloaded Drake & Josh, having somehow developed a craving for it over the past few days. It does bring me happiness. HAPPINESS.

And now, I’m majorly regretting my decision to work in a neighbourhood school. Who am I kidding? I’m a sheltered convent girl who grew up in a middle-income family with a maid. I honestly know nothing about poverty, hardships or having to work and study at the same time.

So going into a neighbourhood might be too much of a stretch for me. I mean, how am I supposed to relate to these kids?

In other news, I gave what I thought was a pretty resounding speech to Shufen who fell asleep in the middle of it. =/

And that’s been my life for the past few days.

Tomorrow, I mambo the night away with my girls.

Maybe, if you’re lucky, I’ll blog about it.

When busy streets amass with people

I haven’t blogged in a while.

Before I do, however, I would just like to say, for the record, that stick-on tattoos are a horrible idea.

Hmm… I’m going to leave Singapore for Manchester in a few months.

And I plan to use this as a way to dictate events that happen to me while I’m away.

So do expect more stuff on this blog in the near future.

Also, I think I just had one of the world’s shortest relationships.

And honestly? I thought I got away unscathed.

But I guess as with my infatuations, you only know when you meet another guy.

Oh well.

I think I only did what I did because I was very bored.

Anyway, I’m going try for relief teaching now.

Oh God. I am so boring.

It’s all about the wordplay

So, I had a crazy week.

To start it off, Alex asked me to be his girlfriend.

Which I said yes to because I didn’t see the harm.

And although we’ve talked about it, I think we’re now both confused on whether we’re a couple or not. HAHAHA.

Andd… I finally talked to my mum. So i’m most probably going to UK.

I already applied for accommodation at Manchester. :D

I NEED TO PACK FOR TAIWAN. DAMN YOU PROCRASTINATION.

Alone

I DONT FUCKING CARE ANYMORE. FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK!!!!!!

I FEEL MY HEART BREAKING INTO TINY PIECES.

I FEEL MY DREAM BEING WASHED AWAY.

I FEEL MY WHOLE WORLD COMING TO AN END.

I FEEL LIKE IF I DIE NOW, EVERYTHING WOULD JUST GO AWAY.

EVERYTHING WOULD BE BETTER.

I WOULD BE FREE FROM ALL THIIS PAIN.

Hopelessly devoted to you

I love how he makes me feel when I’m super upset and need someone to talk to. He’s surprisingly always there at the right moments, time difference be damned.

But we still need to talk. And I don’t care how uncomfortable it gets for him.

I wondered what went wrong so that she had to roam the streets.

“Fuck southeast asian academics. Its too hard and demanding and you all are smarter than the rest of the world ever will be anyway.”

I think God put Alex in my life for a reason.

FUCKING GOING CRAZY.

You and I both loved.

So I think I'm gonna break up with him. Except, is it counted as a break up if we never were official?

Anyway, it's for the best. He's graduating soon and I don't wanna be the bitch that made him spend more time with me instead of his books. And we've only known each other for a week and a half so it's better that we break now.

So why do I feel so rotten inside?

What the hell is it about him that makes me feel like I've known him forever and I wanna be with him?? I'm crazy, right? It's not like I've even met the guy in person.

So why is it so damn hard to let go?

You tell me your blue skies fade to grey

I honestly cannot wait to start school. Firstly, all feelings of laziness would mostly leave. Secondly, I would get to meet new friends. And lastly, I wouldn’t feel like shit most of the time.