Head under water, now I can't breathe.

Okay. Let's start with 'I may be PMSing. Or maybe I'm really feeling so pissed off I could kill someone.'

Let's also add on to that with 'This is going to be a long post and it isn't sunshine-y and happy whoohoo. If you don't like it and/or have a problem with me, please click on the red cross at the corner of the browser and please, for GOODNESS' sake, DON'T visit my blog again. Thank you.'

So yes, if you're still here, then it means you either care enough about my problems so you want to read what I have to say. Or maybe it means you like to see me suffer because you are a ego-manical sadist who engages in schadenfreude.

Anyway, whatever the case, I don't care anymore. Okay? I don't. Really. I need to concentrate on my A'levels this year, I don't need bullshit in my life.

I don't need HORRIBLE miscommunication from people just to ruin my night and make me so frustrated I can't even focus on my schoolwork. I don't need people scrutinizing my EVERY SINGLE effing move, just WAITING for me to mess up so they can rub their disgusting hand in my face and yell, 'HAHA. KNEW IT WAS A MISTAKE.'

I don't need pity, I don't need a stupid shoulder to cry on. I JUST WANT TO BE LEFT ALONE.

I don't need drama, I don't need craziness right now because, honestly, it's getting old, sweeeeetie. Really.

You want me to say it? Okay, I'll say it. I regret it. I regret it like I regret every single damn wrong move I have ever had the misfortune of making in my short 18 years here on earth. Sometimes I regret it so much, I start wishing about 'what ifs'. The moment you do that... you are soooo..

Anyway, I'm tired. I'm so tired. I come home every night just wanting to plonk my head on my pillows and sleep until morning. However, I can't do that. I can't afford to.

So PLEASE, I'm FREAKING begging you people. Stop with your nonsense. STOP with your ridiculous self-centred ways of deciding how to 'GOVERN' yourselves. I don't care what YOU do in your life. Just DON'T WRECK MINE.

I swear, I am this close to calling out names like 'asshole' and 'idiot'. But I have enough diginity left in me not to do so.

I had to stop my work to type this. Because I couldn't even concentrate on vectors.

And it's LENT.

Joy.

The time of your life

Just a regular ol' Chinese New Year.

Life is better without drama.

Never knowing if there's solid ground below.

Stop judging me you asshole.

You don't know me at all.

It's almost over.

Seeking a momentary fix

I feel quite horrible. I think it's that time of the month.

All I want to do is crawl under the covers and stay there.

Have you ever felt like detachhing yourself from reality forever. Just so you didn't have to face anything ever again?

Or maybe it's just the emotions that overwhelm me because I don't have anything going for me.

On a side note, my eighteenth birthday went smashingly well, only to be spoiled when my mother proclaimed me an alcoholic for drinking a little vodka.

I went online today. Now, I'm an internet addict.

I took the bus, now the only thing I'm obsessed with is public transport.

Can you tell me..

Sunny Day


Sweepin' the clouds away

On my way to where the air is sweet



Can you tell me how to get,

How to get to Sesame Street



Come and play

Everything's A-OK

Friendly neighbors there

That's where we meet



Can you tell me how to get

How to get to Sesame Street

Call me an insomniac

The ipad. Seriously? Haha!

Anyway, it's horrible to have a fever.

I really have nothing to do because almost everything gives me a headache.

:(

We all want to be Prince.

Can someone tell me why I feel like this?

Like, completely unsure of what to do next.

Move the king, or keep him safe and sacrifice my horse?

Is the king worth it?

And why is it I'm not feeling how I'm supposed to feel?

Am I really that mean?

I'll make a wish for you, and hope it will come true.

Lemme warn you guys.

I remember things.

Unimportant things.

And I will not hesitate to use them against you.

Really.

Like, you'll do something (e.g. annoy me.) and I'll remember the other 9, 999 times you did the same.

Yes.

I remember.

MWAHAHA.

I don't really like to bear grudges, though. Not worth my time. :)

*click*

I'll make a wish for you, and hope it will come true.

No more talk of darkness.

Everyone is at home today.

This is a first. :)

Then say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime

Let me lead you from your solitude
Say you need me with you, here beside you,
Anywhere you go, let me go too,
That's all I ask of you

Let's just assume life is crazy and unexpected.

You wake up one day thinking that you're finally free from worries that previously tugged on your already sore thoughts, and then, POOF! Worry comes flying in like one of those little fairy things you see in Disney movies.

Of course Worry isn't so glitzy and PG-13.

Oh, and then, of course, life gets better because you realise that what you previously thought was true decided to whack you back in the bum and say, 'It's not! Haha!'

You don't have to understand me, honestly. I wonder how many people would, actually? If Mel was readinf this, she'd probably have her puzzled face on. Haha.

The ironic thing is that I still think my life gets boring. Then again, any more 'action' and I'll probably get a full-blown heart attack.

It's funny, honestly. How everything seems to just work out in the end?

Okay, right now it's not all happy la la joy land.

Anyway, chemistry is actually not half-bad... I'm beginning to like it a little.

Irony = Word of the day.

What's Ironic: Got Chem tuition for my O'levels 2 years ago. Tutor also taught me both maths and physics on the side. Got A1 for all maths and physics. Got A2 for chem.

Don't make a fuss

I feel that much happier.

I guess.

I don't know anymore.

Sometimes, you just get so tired and all you want to do is fall asleep for a long time.

Sometimes you need someone to talk to, but the moment you have that someone, you don't know what to say.

Sometimes, you want to do something, but the moment that opportunity arrives, you sit there and do nothing.

Sometimes, all you want is not to care anymore.

Because it's not worth it.

Sometimes.