I won't sleep tonight so I can keep from going insane.

Not physically in the UK and I already have 3 events to attend.

I'm pretty excited to be back in university.

It's been a fine, but tad dull, summer.

Seeing my friends made me happy.. But in the end, I suppose I crave the excitement.

The next time I blog, I may be in the UK.

Or perhaps I won't blog.

You know how it is... I blog for a bit and shut my lips for a few months or so.

I'll try though. :)

Couldn't understand how to work it out

Tonight was one of those nights I really enjoyed.

Nothing special or out-of-the-ordinary happened. I just spent 4 hours talking to my best friend.

It was one of those HTHTs we have once in a while.

Joan and I have a really special relationship. For some (best) friends, constant communication is needed to keep the relationship from drifting or turning awkward. For Joan and I, we rarely get the time to just talk. And talk, and talk, and talk. And yet we know the foundation is there. Rarely breaking away.

The subjects varied. From intense, upsetting, and silent, to happy, amusing and carefree.

We talked about anything and everything under the sun. (Figure of speech, since it was actually under the watchful eye of the moon.)

We've known each other for 15 years. That's 3/4s of my life (or 75%). No one knows me better than her. Sometimes, scarily enough, that list includes myself.

I thank God for technology. Without it, I wouldn't know how I'd survive without her for so long.

This is dedicated to my darling best friend who is one of the only people in the world incapable of judging me (much) for any of my actions.

The best thing I never had

These two weeks will probably be really amazing.

Mostly because my parents will oblige to most of my requests before I leave.

And it's taking a LOT of me not to overstep the boundary.

Oh gosh, I'm such a bloody spoilt brat.

You could go the distance, you could run the mile.

I feel like I'm living two lives.

There's the one I live, in Singapore. It's the same one that's loud and crazy and has her best friends surrounding her. It's the same one where my family is, where my favourite foods are, where I know where I am, where I feel most comfortable in. I feel settled.

Then, there's the one I live, in Manchester. It's also a crazy, loud life, with extremely close friends I'd keep for life. The same life that includes independence, accountability for my own actions, late nights, later mornings, and full-on excitement. I feel like there's so much to explore, and I often find myself wanting to discover more.

Neither life is horrible to live, neither life is perfect. Both lives have their pros, and their cons.

In Singapore, I know my path in life. It's more or less fixed. It's just there. In Manchester, I don't really know what's going to happen from one day to the next. One minute I could be reading a book, with plans to spend a quiet night in, the next, I could be dressing up to hit the clubs because of peer-pressure. It's scary sometimes, but 'good' scary.

I honestly don't know which life I'd want to lead. Excitement seems like the more enticing path now, but that's probably because I'm 20, still wanting to suck the juice out of life before it gets dull and empty. Stability seems like the more practical choice in the long run...

I only hope that the next year will bring with it more answers.

For now, as I start pulling my clothes out and packing them for a 15-hour flight back, I am filled with anticipation for the upcoming year.

With old and new friends, a new apartment, new modules, and more parties, I suppose I should just relax and let God take care of the 'less important' decisions. ;D